Dear Diary: Decisions

When I was originally going to write this post I wasn't in a good place in my life despite everything that's happened in the p...

When I was originally going to write this post I wasn't in a good place in my life despite everything that's happened in the past month. I mean, what have I got to be sad about? I've spent an amazing month back in England with my friends and family, and I got to go to the absolutely beautiful Ravello in Italy, to see one of my best friends marry the man of her dreams at the most perfect wedding imaginable.

I won't go into too much detail but I felt really down with everything in my life - I was confused, conflicted, and exhausted from all the thinking - it was a lot of little things adding up to make one big messy ball of something. I'll even admit that a lot of the time it was just me feeling sorry for myself, but I'm allowed to be selfish right?

I think the main reason I felt like this was because I didn't know what I was doing with my life; my visa for Australia expires in October - Do I stay? Do I go? Do I head back to England? Do I travel some more? WHAT DO I DO?! 

I'll put this in an analogy for you: When I'm trying on clothes, I'm either in love or I'm not. If I'm umm-ing and ahh-ing about whether to buy something and I'm not 100% happy, then my answer is no. I'm using that same reasoning with staying in Australia. I'm not 100% behind the idea of staying here permanently, so I've decided it's time to move on. (I really hope that makes sense, haha)

In a couple of months I start travelling again, everything's officially booked, 100% confirmed. I'm flying to Darwin for a few days before heading to Uluru (Ayers Rock for some of you that may not know), from there I will fly to Sydney for the NRL Rugby League Grand Final, and then onto New Zealand. I will talk about my plans nearer the time, but I hope to travel New Zealand for about a month and a half and then head back home to England. 

Honestly, I feel like a massive weight has been lifted off of my shoulders; physically and emotionally. As simple as it sounds, sometimes writing your thoughts down (however vague they may sound to everyone else) is just what you need; it's what I needed anyways!

I've got a lot to update you on with regards to my month away, however, lots has happened. I really can't wait to let you in on everything that went on in my life and write up all my experiences. So let's keep positive and look forward to reminiscing on the good times I've had and the even better times I'm looking forward to in the future! 

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